5.23.05


Waking up this morning in a place not only nicer than I have ever stayed in, but likely nicer than places Queen Elizabeth stayed in wasn't at all bad. Waking up this morning in said place, cradled in tufted bedding and opening my eyes to see the sweetest face I could possibly ask to see sleeping right beside me was even better. And waking up in said place, with said face opening his beautiful blue-green eyes at me and smiling to see my face was basically as good as it gets. If it gets better than that...

... well, I'm not sure I even know how to process that.

This has been a brilliant trip, and it's only Monday morning. I'm en route via ferry to see a friend and mentor I've never met, it's a gorgeous sunny day, and in the last 24 hours alone I have had three magnificent baths, only one of which I've taken alone. I'm silly, spaced out but centered from all the hot water, from many long, orgasmic bouts and from several days solid spent basking in the glow of this incredible thing I'd never really anticipated having, and was fairly sure, my weary, but tenacious, romanticism aside, did not truly exist.

One of the things that is so amazing about this is not merely that I find myself unbearably happy; that when standing on a street and having Mark walk up beside me my heart flip-flops in my chest, doing a few somersaults before giving my head and my history an enthusiastic high-five. Rather, it's that I feel the way I do, I get one look into those eyes looking back at my with the same giddy and I know it's absolutely, positively, 100% real.

Last night we had dinner with a wing of the Heather Corinna Seattle posse (and it is a bit funny that in cities I don't even live in, and have never lived in, like this one, that I have a posse at all, let alone a group of people I know fairly well who need be divided through three different evenings, no less). Peter and his love, Molly, Jonothon, Ross and Caroline, Jhames and the current object of his affection, Becka and Darius. Near the end of the meal, Ross and I were discussing something I'd brought up with Mark not long before.

That is this: when you have this unbelievable thing happen, this bit where you feel you have very clearly met Your Person, and they you, how much of it is harmony, commonality, the two of you simply having natures and characters that simply make for natural and effortlessly graceful dancing partners; how much of it is something to the tune of fate, destiny or some divine design, and how much of it is simply timing?

In other words, when any two people met who have this feeling, this nearly instant and inarguably natural partnership, even if everything else were intact and "meant to be," for lack of better words, if the timing were off in terms of how they approached one another, would it still happen? If both parties were not, at that precise moment in time, able to approach each other with at least one simultaneous moment of complete openness to the whole works, with an acceptance and belief that this sort of thing truly can be, could it be at all? I'd not only suspect it couldn't be, I would also suspect that that timing, that blip on the screen of serendipity is probably an incredibly large part of the equation, perhaps to a degree far greater than the other parts of the whole.

Saturday evening, Mark got the fine, fine idea of catching a baseball game in the city -- which was a fine, fun adventure, involving both of us doing the occasional happydance that on top of everything else we both got out of this deal, we got a ball game boyfriend/girlfriend, and me doing an extra happydance because I got a new cap for my team, a selfless act, I might add, on the part of my dearie, whose team is not the same as my own. Standing atop the stadium outside having a smoke, I wondered for a moment that if I hadn't yet met Mark, and he myself, if in a venue like this, perhaps standing ten or twenty feet away in a place as populated as a baseball stadium, if we'd have known one another on sight or not. Could we have had any clue in a glance, or might we just have passed one another by? And if we'd have met at any other time but the time that we did, perhaps right down to the hour that we did, would this have happened at all?

Of course, I'll never have any way of knowing that, and neither will he nor could anyone else in a similar situation, but it's compelling to me.

It is, of course, entirely possible that I am simply devising more unanswered questions for myself because Mark appears to be the answer to one of the biggest unanswered questions I've had through my life, one I was fairly certain -- as likely a good number of big questions one has in life will be -- would simply ever go unanswered.

* * *
In the middle of the sound on the ferry right now, the sun gleaming on the water, the scents of the water incredibly crisp and clear, the deep greens of the islands spotting the landscape. It's so lovely. But I digress.
* * *

I can already tell that leaving this time is going to be difficult for me.

The other night, sitting for one of many times in the hot tub in the yard of the house he shares, we stayed up late talking and talking, and I told Mark some things about myself and my history which I have never told anyone save whatever other parties were involved. Not good things: things I have done or been that were my least proud moments or things that are diffuclt, even scary, and certainly very loaded. Some of why I've not told anyone else these things before is a matter of trust for keeping them private. But in all honesty, the bigger issue is that so often the love, like and connection I have felt with other people has felt to very tenuous and conditional that I have never felt safe enough to share some of this stuff. I haven't wanted to tell anyone because I was never 100% certain I wanted anyone THAT close to me before. In some ways, it didn't feel fair for him not to know some of the bad stuff, too. I think, too, that some of this unreal realness of this means that I have to risk (and not just me, mind you) showing the whole enchilada: not just the parts of me or my history I know will be liked and respected or admired, but those which aren't admirable in any way.

So, I did. And he listened (and we both did some of this). And he by no means was impressed, and yes, had a moment of looking a little amazed and perhaps even a little apalled, which anyone would/should be for certain things unless they weren't giving them the proper gravity.

And he took it in, didn't try and excuse any of it or absolve me from it, but instead accepted it and let me know very clearly that I was still cherished exactly as before those things were shared.

That was a couple of days ago, and even just writing that stops my breath for a moment because I find that such an amazing, amazing thing. It is one thing to feel cherished and accepted and cared for and admired by someone for whom you feel same when you've your best face on. But I'm not sure that's quite as good -- even though it's far less terrifying and precarious -- as having all of that going on when you're showing the very opposite as openly as it gets.

And here I sit, effortlessly sailing, riding these waters, acting as my mirror.

© 2005 Heather Corinna. All rights reserved